Child Custody – Who Gets Who in the Divorce?

This is a question that keeps parents up at night when people are going through a divorce. Who will the child or children be better off with? Which parent can take care of the children in a way that all of their needs are being met? If the divorce is one which neither party wants to come to an agreement, it can turn into a child custody battle and last longer than expected.

There are many obvious reasons each parent would want custody. Of course the obvious one would be the simple fact of they would be missed terribly by the non-custodial parent. Normally, it used to be that the court system would grant the mother full custody of the children, with every other weekend for the father. This thought process might come from that most people just “assume” the mother is the best parent to raise and care for the child.

From the time a child is born, through the toddler years, and yes, starting school, the mother is almost always the main figure in the process of raising, caring, feeding, supporting, bathing, everything for the child. Of course there are fathers who no doubt do the same along with the mother, but those are far and few between.

But now, that thinking has somewhat become obsolete. Now more than ever the father is fighting for custody of his children. And why not? The father is usually the one who financially supports the family, providing that stable home and environment for everyone in his family.

Fathers are just as much responsible, reliable, and comforting as the mother. A father can do everything a mother can. What matters though is what is best for the child. Putting the child’s best interest is what the judge will consider when deciding who the child or children will live with.

Also, when a child reaches a certain age, 14 for instance, the judge may ask that child where he/she would like to live. From there the judge will take into consideration how that child feels, who that child would like to live with and so forth.

Whoever the judge decides to give custody to, the process of placing a child with one of the parents can be a difficult decision to make. It takes time and patience on everyone’s part to make sure the best selection is made.

In the end the child or children are most important. The courts are in line with that in full.